(10/9/02 11:05:30 am)
| those are really good|
Dear Everyone who wrote: these are all valuable comments and suggestions. I appreciate it and am very now in learning curve. It is hard isn't it to see the world as it is and not spend all one's time either ranting or weeping-- or both? We have to keep talking to each other, find ways to belong to each other whenever we can...it is a small improvement, but one of my uncles was a tool and die maker, a fraction of a centimeter makes the difference between workable and not. We don't have to fix everything, just something. This is my two cent's worth.
There are a lot of wounds from grade school and high school wherein people were not seen or allowed or embraced or helped or shined on, or wanted. Especially wanted. This is such a blow to the heart of the young. ANd, by the way, did anyone think thse problems would be left behind after the graduation recessessional?
One way to see the world of adults is that they are all still and just trying to work out their high school wounds, (added to the family ones), or to hold onto their teeny status gained in high school. It has been a revelation to me as a shrink and just as a person to hear the stories at high school reunions--my own and those of others (I have a special interest as you know in how high school forms and deforms people) my most recent one, my 40th high school reunion; former cheerleaders wont attend because gained weight; class president wants to sell everyone life insurance and makes pest of self; 'former' beauties spending too much time apologizing for not being beautiful any more (I think they are beautiful, but they do not quite understand that beauty is not an age, but that as an artist, you see that every age has its own brand of beauty.) The poor football players, all limping around most of them from injuries in high schoo that have come back to haunt them bigtime now in older age. And there are still the arrogant ones, even after all these years, but they are dang far fewer, and there still are the quiet ones and the strange ones and "the suits and the creatives" are the terms adults currently use to define reality, which of course leaves out the thousands of variations on God's creation of human beings.
But also, there are people making apologies to one another for things said and done long ago, and often harrassment and exclusion is part of the apology equation, but there are others; sexual improprieties, purposeful harm by exclusion, lies, bearing false witness especially against girls.... it goes on.
As well, I have met at reunions people who in high school were thought this or that; I see how lovely they are, have been all along. I see quiet men who have huge hearts and so-called skaggy girls who as young women "did the right thing at great cost" whatever the challenge might have been. In my generation, we lost many to Viet Nam. And I see the beginnings of healing in the children some of our classmates (anglo, black, latino) have had with their Vietnamese wives. This is just my two cents worth...about these stories, yours, mine...
One of the reasons I appreciate the internet is it allows people to speak to each other, as my grandmother said, 'choose those to love with your eyes closed.' Everything can be put to hurtful use including the internet; but I appreciate it when it can be used in small ways for learning and peace, which in my mind can never be separate from one another.
this comes with cariņo,
(10/9/02 1:24:20 pm)
Have you read Jerry Spinelli's Stargirl? It'a about a free-spirited homeschooled girl who turns up at a public high school and about the reactions of the other students to her.
There are elements of Cinderella to the fable, but it is mostly about high school and treasuring people as unique creations. I found it very positive and healing. It made me want to look up someone I'd known in high school to apologize for not being more understanding. I think all of us know a Stargirl, just as we are probably Stargirl (or Starboy) to someone else.
(10/9/02 1:58:35 pm)
| good idea|
Dear Sarah; that was a good idea. I have not read it, but will now.
Thank you for the way you put it so honestly too; that always stands out
(10/10/02 3:34:03 am)
| Goth as a SubCulture|
KnoxGothic is actually discussing "Goth
as a subculture" now.
But, "WARNING: Contains Language, Irreverance, and Sarcasm" applies.
(10/13/02 5:33:55 am)
| Article from Au|
There's an interesting article at
The Age, an Australian paper.
(10/23/02 5:10:17 am)
| Goth Dancing|
From my goth friend, Aynjel, this link will teach you the proper Goth dance moves in order to blend in once you've put on all your black apparel.
I've danced like this for years without the attire...who knew.
(10/23/02 3:59:43 pm)
| "Which way is the exit!"|
ROTFL!!! Thanks - that was highly entertaining as well as educational...nice to see a Goth page that doesn't take itself quite so seriously.